So this is how it ends.
Me, Morgan Carter, movie star, stuck in coach
between stinky sandwich man
and sweaty fat guy. -No.
I swear my mother's trying to kill me.
It isn't a pretty story,
except for the cIothes, the parties and the limos.
-Tell me you did not just do that! -I totally did!
And here we are live from the red carpet
for the world premiere of Morgan Carter's new movie ''She's the Bomb''.
Now Morgan's set to be here at any minute.
You know what? After a series of high-profile breakups,
it's anybody's guess who will be Morgan's date tonight.
You're my mystery date.
It looks like her car is coming up around the corner right now.
Everybody wants a piece of her tonight.
-I'm famous. -So so famous.
We're gonna have the exclusive interview with Morgan.
-Let's do it! -Here's all the paparazzi.
Easy, guys, easy. Here, hang on.
Here we go again.
-Hey, Morgan -oh
Morgan!
How excited are you to be here this evening?
I'm so excited that my best friend Marissa Dahl is here tonight.
And now for our ''Star Report.''
Rumors abound that Morgan Carter
who collapsed outside a Hollywood nightclub four months ago
-is leaving rehab sometime this week. -Turn it off.
The name of the facility is still a closely-guarded secret.
Everyone is dying to know:
-Is Morgan all cleaned up... -Sam, turn it off.
...or messed up?
The good news is they're still talking about her.
Spun like a true manager.
I'm trying, but this has happened too many times.
The studios are not gonna touch her until convinced her recovery's real.
Let's open with that when we see her.
-I'm just saying. -I'm going in first.
Oh my God. This pIace is so depressing.
You think?
-Hi, honey. -Oh, yes!
The Bianca has arrived to spring me.
-I hate it when you call me that. -It's good to see you, too.
Why are you sitting? Come on, let's go.
-We need to taIk. -Why start now, Mom?
Okay, between the clubbing
and the paparazzi and the Perez Hiltons,
it is impossibIe for you to recover in this town.
Whatever.
Listen, I just wanna go to the salon and then the spa. I mean...
Okay, Morgan honey, you're not going to the spa.
In fact, you're not going home.
Where are you guys?
-Sam! My awesome manager. -Where's my Morgan?
Sam, all right, let's step out. This is too much.
So your mother and I have decided
that you should go and stay with your Aunt Trudy for a while.
What the hell are you taIking about?
-Your Aunt Trudy -She isn't even my real aunt.
She's some obscure friend of Bianca's from high school
-and she lives in purgatory. -Fort Wayne, Indiana.
-Same thing. -Nevertheless,
you will be living there and going to school there.
Going to school? A public schooI? Are you lit?
I'll get mobbed by the press.
Yeah, we thought of that. We thought of that,
so while you are in Fort Wayne, you are not Morgan Carter,
you are... are you ready for this?
... you are Claudia Miller.
And no one's gonna recognize you as a brunette.
-This is great, huh? -Huh!
I get it.
I'm on some reaIity show, right?
Hidden cameras...
-So you guys are serious? -Mm-hmm.
For how long?
As Iong as it takes, Morgan.
-Oh my God. What is this? -New luggage.
Average 17-year-olds don't carry Louis Vuitton bags.
-Earrings. -Quentin Tarantino gave these to me.
Exactly.
She'll be wearing these by tonight.
I guess this means I'm not getting the Soderbergh film.
He didn't think you were right for the part.
Sam, the part is a teen alcoholic.
They're thinking of aging it up, you know, rewriting it for Will Ferrell.
-I'm not gonna go. -You shut down your last film.
Nobody's gonna touch you right now. Do you understand that?
''Coach''?
I make $5 million a film and I'm fIying coach?
Claudia Miller has a budget. Claudia Miller flies coach.
Well, I hate her aIready.
-Give her a chance. -Bye, darling. Mommy loves you.
-This is a bad idea. -Bianca, please.
This is a bad idea. She's been working since she was 5 years oId.
She's had stylists,
publicists, assistants.
I'm not sure she can function in the real worId.
Give her a chance.
I had arrived in extreme suburbia as part
of the witless protection program.
Whoa!
I got sober for this.
You're here! How was your flight?
I died twice in my mind.
Yeah, I hate to fIy.
Well, welcome.
-Anti-hug? -Yes, I am.
Well, you go ahead in
and I'll-- yeah, I'll get your bags.
The last time I saw Aunt Trudy I was 5 years old.
She's now divorced and works as a plant lady,
though her house is suspiciously devoid
of plants and other living things.
Her decor is more like Willy Wonka on acid.
Come on in. I'll give you a little minitour, okay?
Okay, great.
I mean, there were multicolored polka dots everywhere,
even on the ceiling.
-And oh, my God, that clock. -Made it myseIf.
And it seems to be made out of ...
Licorice.
Of course, who doesn't need edible wall art?
I'm living with a 14-year-old.
Kitchen. You can help yourself to anything, okay?
Correction. I'm living with a 10-year-old.
My room has rainbow-striped walls,
a closet that wouldn't even fit my Dolce & Gabbanas
and Pepto-colored sheets with happy little butterflies
and no thread count.
So go ahead and settle in. Take a nap if you like.
Your mom gave me some money for school clothes,
so we'll hit the mall later.
How can they expect me to live
in the Tim Burton version of suburbia?
Sober no less?
The new Stuart Weitzman shoes!
Wow, I saw these during New York Fashion Week
and they're beautiful.
-$325. -Yeah, you shouId get a pair, too.
I couId buy a hundred flip-flops for that amount of money.
Anyway, your mom only gave me $500 for everything.
Hello.
I cannot buy a new wardrobe and shoes
for 500 freaking doIIars.
$500 is a lot of money, Morgan.
Let's be real, Mom. Every time you walk into a store, you spend double that.
That is so not the point. You've only been in Fort Wayne for half a day.
Why don't you trying fitting in?
Thanks for calling me, by the way.
I figured you'd call me.
Which I just did to teII you that I need more money.
No.
''No''? What do you mean ''No''?
It's my money. I earned it.
What the hell am I supposed to do here?
Figure it out.
She hung up on me.
I'm broke, stranded in a flyover state,
with no stylist
and she hung up on me.
Then lunch is on me.
I think it's safe to lose the sunglasses and hat.
Are you serious? I'll be signing autographs for, like, an hour.
May I take your order?
-Do you have a carb-free burger? -Nope.
How about anything with a fat content under 20% ?
No idea.
Okay. I'II just have a garden salad.
Our salads have sugar in them.
Whatever, I'll have a burger...
with everything on the side, even the bun.
I don't have a button for that.
Stan!
She wants a burger with everything on the side,
including the bun.
We don't have a button for that.
No one recognized me.
How insane is that?
Well, I guess your disguise is working then, huh?
Where the hell am I supposed to shop?
There.
I'd rather go naked.
Listen, while I totally respect your taste
in shoes and cIothes, you're shopping like Morgan Carter.
-I am Morgan Carter. -Claudia Miller might just
like Discount Darling.
Claudia Miller did not love Discount Darling
but, to my horror, she did shop there.
And she has terrible taste.
-How's it going? -It's going.
How long have you been divorced again?
A year, why?
Are you hoping he'll come back for his favorite shirts?
I forgot about these.
Maybe someone other than me is having issues.
So why did you get divorced?
-Rather not taIk about it. -WeII, I'd rather not be here.
Well, then looks like we're stuck then, eh?
I guess we are.
You know, you probabIy should have gotten a backpack.
A backpack?
Actually, Claudia Miller might carry a backpack
to go with her fugly shoes.
Have you ever been to a real high school?
Does my starring roIe in ''She's the Bomb'' count?
No.
Give it here, stupid. Let me do it right.
-I was just trying to... -Don't touch anything.
But we're supposed to be partners.
Can I have a new partner?
Claudia Miller, I am transferring you to freshman math.
Your geometry skills are severely lacking.
So your homework is
to watch a lowbrow comedy
and then write an essay about the eIements that make it Iowbrow...
Did I mention that this guy's a total wanker
complete with a fake accent like the one Madonna got
after she became British?
...the eIements that give the genre
its characteristic traits, Iike cinema verite,
something like that--
the plot,
the gags, the slapstick.
Yes?
What exactly do you consider lowbrow?
Anything by the Farrelly brothers.
Yeah, they're definitely the kings of gross-out humor
but haven't they made an art of it?
Well, that will depend
whether you consider semen jokes art
Wasn't there a time when Shakespeare would have been considered lowbrow?
Yes, but that is theater.
Now your essay should not only include the elements...
I think I've heard enough from you.
Let's give someone else a chance.
Your essay should include...
where are you going?
-The bathroom. -No. Sit.
No?
Class is almost over. Sit.
What the hell? I need permission to go to the bathroom?
Okay.
Starch starch
starch, grease.
Lunch in the cafeteria of doom.
Who eats this stuff?
$1.50.
Oh, I don't have money.
I mean, I have money. I have Iots of money,
but I just... can I sign for it?
Next!
In the movies, mean but beautiful school princess,
usually pIayed by me,
approaches the new girl and says something like,
''Hey, you're new, right?''
Ominous music plays and odds are that the new girl
is about the steal the princess's boyfriend or homecoming title.
Hey. I'm new.
In the real world, no one talks to the new girl.
And you might as well have written ''new girl''
on my forehead with a Sharpie.
There's our princess now.
Excuse me. Is this yours?
Where did you get this?
The fIoor.
You're kidding me. For reaI?
Okay, that was weird.
Who is she?
No idea. I don't get it.
And the new girl strikes out again.
Let's go talk to her.
Hey.
My mom would have killed me. Thanks.
No problem.
And you are?
Claudia Miller, new girI.
I saw you this morning in chemistry.
Yeah, my Iab partner wants to deport me.
Yeah, well, some people aren't so friendIy.
It was actually going pretty okay.
She was testing me, and I was passing.
You think?
-And then... -Where did you get those jeans
and those dorky shoes?
Were you dumpster diving?
Oh, no, I borrowed them from your mother.
Watch your mouth, welfare baby.
And just like that,
me who wears and personally knows Donatella Versace
was rejected for my cIothes and bad shoes.
No longer in the starring role,
I had become an extra in my own life,
and I needed a drink... yesterday.
In Los Angeles, AA meetings are like
having lunch with your agent...
everybody does it.
It would be so much easier to go inside if I had a drink first.
Which is why you have to go inside.
Maybe we could just go hang out somewhere instead.
-I gotta work. -This is really what you do?
You spend your time alone in empty offices watering pIants?
Sometimes I even speak to them.
What kind of a lame career is that?
Okay, look, in the real worId
there's this thing called a filter.
Use it before you speak. Now go inside.
But what if someone recognizes me, seriously?
I mean, I doubt for a minute they'll honor the anonymous part.
They'll take out their cell phones, take a picture...
Are you wearing panties? Hey, I watch ''Entertainment Tonight.''
You'll be fine.
Well, thanks for the heIp.
-Get me out of here. -Remember what we talked about.
Just pretend you're playing a roIe.
I'm miscast.
Excuse me. Cell phones aren't allowed in here.
-Help me. -Morgan, you're strong.
Come on, Sam!
Okay, everyone, let's get started by welcoming our newcomers
and having them make a brief introduction.
Hi.
My name is Morgan, and I'm an alcoholic.
Hi, Morgan.
I had one line, and I blew it.
Claudia, I'm sorry. Morgan is actually a nickname
and, you know, Claudia's on my birth certificate and everything,
so call me Claudia.
Hi, Claudia.
I was sure one of the two twins
was going to scream out my true identity...
I've been sober for 121 days.
...but they didn't.
No one screamed anything.
Thank you, Claudia.
Okay, so is there anyone this evening
who is ready to receive--
I needed a drink.
And I needed to talk to Marissa,
but Sam and Bianca said no.
It's a stupid rule. I should be able to talk to my friend.
There must be a reason for it.
I'm not supposed to have contact yet with those who enabled me.
Yeah, be careful. I had friends like that. They're called enemies.
Marissa is my best friend.
You do your own nails?
Yeah. I could do yours.
No, I have people who come to the house.
We're back live from the red carpet, and here we have Marissa Dahl.
Oh my God. Speaking of-- that's her right now. Turn it up.
Marissa, how are you doing? You look great. I have a question here.
I have been hearing that you've been cast as the new Aqua Girl.
-I can't beIieve it. -Neither can I.
I mean, I'm really just in such shock.
I grew up reading Aqua GirI, and now I get to be her.
Word is you beat out Sarah Michelle Gellar.
Everybody wanted the part.
I mean, who wouldn't, right?
-Enjoy your night. -Thank you.
-Marissa! -This is not Marissa.
-Who is this? -This is her assistant Troy.
-Who is this? -This is CIaudia-- this is Morgan.
She doesn't know any Claudia Morgan.
I want to talk to Marissa.
Okay, can I tell her what this is regarding?
I'll call her back.
That was her assistant.
Since when does she have an assistant?
I have ice cream.
No, I am not becoming a junk-food addict Iike you.
What are you doing?
I am throwing out these horrifying cIothes!
Unlike you, I take immediate action.
And unlike you, I donate.
Here, tell you what: why don't you just take out the trash?
You want me to take out the trash?
Yes.
At home, when my assistant put out my trash,
the paparazzi would go through it. This is why God invented shredders.
And that's the nice thing about living here.
Your trash is safe. Grasp the little yellow handles,
cinch to close, pull,
remove to curbside.
Funny.
Ah! I hate this. Marissa's a star,
and I am taking out the trash.
It's so unfair.
You ride.
You take out the trash?
It's my favorite.
Very nice bike.
So you read Shakespeare,
you get A's
and you ride a vintage Harley.
It's not mine.
I fix 'em.
You're a mechanic?
Yeah, I also detail.
You're like ''American Chopper'' meets ''Monster Garage.''
What's that, code for something?
Reality TV.
Oh. I don't watch reality TV.
You don't watch reality TV?
Nope, I read.
Okay, stop me here, but mechanics are hot.
-See ya. -Later.
He reads.
He fixes stuff. He's like a Renaissance man.
The internet-- the only place
where Morgan Carter exists these days.
Maybe Perez can help solve my current existential crisis,
or at least remind me of who I used to be.
''Dead?'' They think I'm dead.
Well, my career is totally dead,
which I guess in Hollywood is the same thing.
Hello.
-Hey, you hungry? -No.
-Where's your dog? -What?
Uh, the screensaver. Dogs.
Oh, yeah, he took the dog.
Bye-bye.
Oh, I'm sorry.
No, we had a cute dog trainer.
The dog was badly trained. Now I know why.
So what are you saying, your husband Ieft you for a dog trainer?
Yeah.
-Now I get to ask you a question. -Okay.
When did you start drinking?
Hmm...
I don't even remember starting,
but I just really liked the feeling, so I didn't wanna stop.
I'm really sorry for the things I said earlier and my behavior--
No-- hey, it's a big, loud world, sweetheart.
It's already forgotten.
I wish everything was.
Huh.
I'm really tired. I'm gonna go to sleep.
Okay.
Good night.
-Next! -I paid for my lunch,
which gave me a ridiculous sense of accomplishment.
How pathetic is that?
So what did you write about for film class?
Oh, ''Something About Mary.''
I compared the musical narration to the narratives
-in Shakespeare's play. -Perfect. He'll hate it.
-This is my sister Emily. -Oh.
Hi. Claudia, right?
I saw you when you registered. You signed up for volleyball.
It was the only sport left.
Yeah, I've got it too. We're the only non-Amazons.
-Are you serious? -So did you just move here?
Finally, a chance to use the backstory
-I made up on the plane. -I moved from New York.
I'm living with my Aunt Trudy.
I kind of fell in with the wrong crowd at my old school.
-Has anyone read chapter eight yet? -I read the book.
He finishes all his assignments early.
Leaves more time for life.
Life? There isn't even a club in this town.
So what's fun to do around here?
-Hey, Eli! -Lots of stuff.
You just gotta know where to look. What's up?
So are you liking Hillhaven?
It's bigger than my last school.
There's a lot more kids, so I'm just--
I'm getting used to that.
Aren't you a little young to be divorced?
Divorced? No, I'm...
This is my niece Claudia. She's staying with me for a little while.
Hi, Claudia.
This is my women's divorce support group,
but most of them come because they like my satellite dish.
Sad but true.
-There's more drinks in the kitchen. -Okay.
-She's adorable. -Yeah, she is.
- She's a doll. - Cute as a button.
Okay, so anyone wanna talk about their divorce?
-Not really. -No.
Once again, no. Okay.
I hope this isn't the Angelina Jolie one.
I've seen it twice.
If Angelina stole my husband, I'd think it was an act of God.
We all know Britney. We all know Lindsay and Nicole.
Here we go again.
Is Morgan Carter the latest train wreck?
When you're Morgan Carter, the paparazzi catches your every move...
-Where are these people's parents? -She may be only 17,
but that doesn't mean she can't party like a rock star.
She really knows how to mix things up to keep it exciting,
-and then... -Excuse me!
...there was that life-changing night outside the club.
Dude, get a life! Get a life!
Get a life! You make me sick!
Morgan, Morgan, wake up.
She's not moving! Can somebody go get somebody?
Somebody go call 911 now!
She's not breathing. She's not...
somebody do something!
Morgan didn't die that night,
and while reports claim that Morgan's been released
from rehab, she's all but disappeared...
How long was she in rehab for, a day?
So where in the world is Morgan Carter
and who wiII be the next to fall?
Up next, celebrity...
She's having a rough time in school. New girl.
New girl's the worst.
It's Sam.
You know what to do.
Sam-- Sam, it's me.
Listen, I really need to talk to you.
I just saw...
Listen, I understand why you sent me here,
and you've guided me through every step of my career,
but this is really not working at all.
Can you call me, please?
Just call me.
He wasn't there?
Sam was the first person I saw when I woke up in the hospitaI.
He's the only reason I'm alive.
What about your mom?
Bianca?
Bianca's... whatever.
She's not always around.
At first she was
when I was really little,
but then she hired peopIe for that
and started dating... a lot...
and traveling and...
stuff.
What was my mom like before?
I have a really hard time picturing you two as friends.
Hang on.
We were the popular girls.
We ruled high school
with our big hair and shoulder pads.
Your mom dated everyone, but I just dated the quarterback.
I was so in Iove with him.
Aw. So what happened?
He got a scholarship to Florida State,
so I followed him. I was pre-med.
-You were gonna be a doctor? -Yeah, hard to believe, huh?
Now the closest I get is watching ''Grey's Anatomy.''
Anyway, he blew out his knee
and the only job he could find was as a high school coach
up here in Fort Wayne,
so I quit college and came with him.
That's not a very good story.
Nope.
Meanwhile, your mom was traveling the country, winning pageants.
-Right, the pageant queen. -Mm-hmm.
She thought it was her ticket to Hollywood,
-that she would become... -Me.
Yeah.
She was on ''General Hospital'' playing a nurse for, like, a week,
and that's when she met the sperm donor.
I don't think she even got my dad's real name.
Listen, honey,
your mom was confused for a long time,
but I really do think she's trying to sort it all out now.
Maybe.
You okay?
Yeah.
I gotta make a nacho refresher.
No, good. You should.
This is Bianca. You know what to do.
-Hey, Mom.
It's me your daughter.
I just wanted to call, check-in
and I wanted to say that I...
...miss you.
Damn! Why didn't you wake me? I'm gonna be late.
If I'm late again, they're gonna make me scrub gum off the concrete.
-Claudia! -What?
It's Saturday.
Oh.
I can get two sweaters for $40? What's the catch?
There's no catch. The miracle of discount shopping.
I can see why Martha Stewart loves this place.
-Yeah. -Wow.
Ooh! Hey, this shirt is perfect for you.
I don't think so.
I do.
Chest advertising is a great way to meet really nice guys.
And that way you can start spending less time with plant material.
Well, thank you. No.
Thank you, yes.
I called Sam five times and he didn't call me back. Is he mad at me?
I think he's just trying to give you your space,
-let you make your own decisions. -Did he say that?
I haven't spoken to either of them since your mom sent me the money.
What is this?
This has nothing to do with a bomb.
There's not even a bomb in this movie.
They totally changed the ad for the DVD.
This looks like ''Mean Girls'' meets ''Die Hard.''
Everything I worked for,
everything is gone.
It's just a movie, come on.
Oh my God. Oh my God.
You're gonna start hyperventilating. Here, here. Breathe into this.
Breathe.
So there you have it.
Right in the middle of aisle five,
a discount breakdown.
For some of you,
I don't think that we are in Kansas anymore.
Ouch.
Let me give you a piece of advice, Claudia.
You have to figure out what he wants to hear
and then give it to him.
You clearly don't have a clue about film.
New essay topic, people:
The difference between movies and film.
I really thought it was the one class I would do well in.
I'm failing geometry and chemistry, but film class? He hates me.
Hey, Eli, you coming?
-No, go on ahead. It's cool. -Okay.
You know, this is pretty good.
You just need some supporting statements, like...
quote Richard Schickel. Sappey'll love it.
Yeah, Schickel. Good idea.
-You know who Schickel is? -Yeah, ''Time'' magazine,
one of the nation's most influential film critics.
I'm only partly hopeless.
All right, then you know if he gives you a bad grade,
you know it's personal.
If you want me to boost you in geometry and chemistry, that's cool.
Boost me? You hardly know me?
-Tutor you. -Oh, okay.
See, I'm hopeless, but no, yeah, that sounds good.
-All right. See ya. -Bye.
Okay, ladies, we're gonna run the practice drill.
So what's up with the blue and gold everywhere?
School colors.
I'm loving the shorts, by the way.
These are improved. You should have seen the ones that went below the knee.
Sexy.
I hear they buy the shorts the same place
you get your jeans, actuaIIy.
Is that right next to the Bargain Cuts where you get your hair bleached?
Okay, let's take your positions.
Emily's team-- digs and returns. Julie's team-- sets and spikes.
Spike? The only thing I know how to spike is a drink.
Here we go, girls!
I just have to remind myself I'm Morgan Carter,
the second-youngest actress ever nominated
for an Academy Award.
-Nice setup! -Go for it!
-Mother...
You bitch! You bitch! You bitch! What the--
It hurts. What the-- you dumb bitch!
-Red card? How does that-- -Miller, to the principaI's office now.
I've gotten several reports about you over the past two weeks,
none of them positive.
Four tardies, low grades and now this outburst.
Ms. Miller-- CIaudia...
your job right now
is to be on time, study hard
and discover your special skill, hmm?
My skill is acting,
like right now.
If you don't pull up your averages, you'll fail your senior year.
-Fail? -You need to start applying yourself
and cease with the outbursts.
I'd like to hear it from you.
No more outbursts...
even if someone is trying to maim me with a volleyball.
Lindsay got the Soderbergh film?
That's impossible!
Sorry.
I can't believe it. I'm washed up at 17.
-Claudia, talking to yourself? -Oh my God.
You bipolar or just everyday-average screwed up?
Door number two, I think.
Sam, Sam, Sam, it's me.
Sam, the point is the principal made me feel like a total imbecile.
Get me out of here.
Call me, okay?
You know what? I'm becoming very concerned
that my comeback will be as a ''Surreal Life'' cast member.
So seriously, call me.
No one is washed up at 17.
We're baking.
What's with all the baking
and the junk food?
It's called avoidance, and it's terrific.
You should try it sometime.
I have. It's called drinking. Maybe we're not that different.
Maybe. Read.
You need an egg and some bowls--
The bowls are over there. I need two of them.
Okay. I'm bored already.
Do you ever think about your stuff for real?
What, you mean like the fact that my husband came downstairs,
ate a bowl of cereal, like every morning,
and then announced that he was leaving me for the dog trainer?
Yeah, I think about it.
Then I think about the fact that he actually left the bowl for me to wash.
Okay, what about the rest of it, though?
You wanted to be a doctor. You wanted to go to medical school.
-Nah, that ship sailed. -That's it?
You're just gonna water plants for the rest of your life?
I ask because-- I mean, in rehab we learned all about...
facing your fears and chasing them down.
My greatest fear is that I can't act anymore
and no one would care.
And then it happened.
Just because you're not acting doesn't make you irrelevant.
Not according to the principal
or to my mother or apparently to Sam.
I just don't think I can do anything else.
Listen, I know it doesn't feel like it right this second,
but you have only lived
a very small sliver of your life.
Well, look who's talking.
Come on, when I was your age I wanted everything right then and there.
I was racing toward that finish line
and I ended up messing it aII up.
-You're 17. -What does that mean?
-It means be 17 for a little while. - Oh!
Could that be another divorcee seeking nachos?
Oh, hi, come on in.
Claudia!
Hi.
Hey, Emily, what are you doing here?
I wanted to make sure you'd recovered from the attack of the Amazon woman.
Are you okay?
It was like a scene out of ''7th Heaven'' or something.
She acted like she really cared, which confused me.
Emily, nice to meet you. Don't be a stranger.
Okay.
I also wanted to invite you to my sleepover on Friday.
That's really sweet.
Sleepovers aren't really my thing, though, but thank you.
Sometimes I get the feeling
that you don't really wanna be my friend.
It's not true. I just--
I have a hard time trusting peopIe.
Don't tell anyone, but my best friend from my oId schooI,
she stole a bunch of SAT questions and then she bIamed it on me.
Oh my God. Did you get expelled?
Let's just say it's a big part of the reason I'm here.
Well, I won't tell anyone. Pinkie promise.
Thank you.
Anyway, think about the party. It'll be a really cool time.
I will. I will think about it.
Emily, you know what? I thought about it,
and it sounds like it'll be fun, you know, whatever.
-Let's give it a shot. -Yes!
We're gonna have so much fun.
Yes, it'll be great.
-Bye. -Bye.
My first sleepover.
Strike that. My first unscripted one.
-Hi! -Hey!
We just turned Bethany's hair bue.
Not exactly the kind of girls I would have hung with at home.
I mean, I used to party with princesses,
actual princesses.
I can't believe I let Trudy talk me into this.
It could be worse. I bet I'd have more fun chaperoning
her hot date watering begonias or whatever it is she does.
If Trudy spent as much time around people as she did plants,
maybe she'd have a date with a reaI live human once in a while.
Oh.
Truth or dare?
What's the furthest you've gone with a guy? Debbie.
Second.
-Okay, maybe third base. -What?
Wait. What do you mean maybe? Don't you know?
I only answer one question per turn.
So truth or dare?
Truth.
Okay, is it true you got kicked out of your old school
for doing your boyfriend in the cafeteria?
Debbie.
No. Who told you that?
It's a hot rumor. I heard it, too.
So then why did you get kicked out?
I only answer one question per turn.
I dare you to tell everyone who you have a crush on at school.
At Hillhaven? I don't have a crush on anyone.
Really? No one?
This girl was starting to bug.
-Liar. -My instinct was to pounce on her.
Instead, I unfortunately said...
Besides, I already have a boyfriend.
You do?
Crap, why did I say that?
You're lying. What's his name?
Evan Walsh.
Evan Walsh, the actor?
Why couldn't I say ''Joe Smith''?
Joe Smith was the obvious answer.
No, they have the same name, but they're obviously not the same person.
-Yeah. -I didn't think so.
I mean, you dating Evan Walsh,
the actor. That's funny.
-Eli. -Oh! Hey, Eli.
Hey, Debbie, Bethany.
-Girls' night. -Hey, Claudia.
Hi.
And suddenly, all became clear in Debbie's tiny little world.
She crushed on Eli,
and she worried about the new girl-- me--
riding off into the sunset with him.
Okay, who wants to watch a movie?
-Me. -Anything to end
the Spanish Fort Wayne Inquisition.
Okay, we've got ''Go Panthers,'' ''Bring It On,'' ''Legally Blonde''
and ''Girls on Top.''
And there it was, with my face
Taking up exactly 33% of the DVD cover
Yes, exactly 33%. It was in my contract
Let's watch ''Go Panthers.''
Isn't that the girl that ODed-- Megan Carter?
Morgan Carter. Yeah, that's her.
Let's watch ''Legally Blonde.'' That's one of my favorite movies.
Yeah, and who gets implants at 13?
Yeah, I mean, and she can't even act.
I mean, I'm a better actress than she is.
Well, I think she's really good.
If she's so great, then why was she hooked on heroin?
It wasn't heroin! It was alcohol.
I read somewhere.
Hey, Claudia, you kind of look like her.
Not now, please not now.
I don't think so. Morgan's a blonde.
Yeah.
And not to mention, she's twice the bra size.
And also she's way skinnier. No offense, Claudia.
None taken.
Where's your bathroom?
okay, so I had gained some weight in rehab
and at Trudy's.
No.
But had I Iost my breasts? What the hell was going on?
Was I still Morgan or was I really Claudia?
You don't have a cigarette, do you?
Forget cigarettes.
I don't get you, 'cause you seem to like it here.
I mean, you seem to be okay.
As opposed to...?
Tearing down the walls, drinking till you fall over.
I think you want the guys who hang out behind the 7-11.
Look up.
What do you see?
Nothing.
The sky.
I went to New York one time. I Iooked up...
and I saw buildings.
The sky was crowded.
I don't know. I like it here.
I never look up.
See those little dots up there? Called stars.
Heard you got sent to the principaI's office.
Yeah.
Hey, maybe we can start that tutoring we talked about.
That's a great idea.
What's a great idea?
Tutoring Claudia.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Tomorrow. Try not to tear down any walls in the meantime.
Okay.
Here's the thing, Claudia:
I Iike EIi, and we've been friends for a very long time,
and it's going to the next level.
The next lev--
does he know that?
I'm serious. Stay away from him.
It was such cliched dialogue,
I couIdn't believe it was still being used.
I'm serious. Find somebody else to play with,
or maybe you should go call your fake boyfriend.
Anything to get away from you, freak girl.
This is Bianca. You know what to do.
Pick up. Pick up.
Just pick up, pick up, pick up.
Pick up.
Hello.
I'm looking for Bianca Carter. Who is this?
This is her husband. Who's this?
Husband? This is her daughter.
Oh my God.
Oh God, oh God, oh God.
Sam?
Is that you? Sam! Sam!
Sam, Sam, Sam, talk to me.
What is-- what is going on?
Sam, Sam, Sam!
Morgan... honey.
Did you get married? Did you marry Sam?
Okay, calm down, Morgan.
You got married without even telling me.
When did this happen?
Last week. We didn't want to tell you
because we didn't want to mess with your recovery.
You're making this about me? How dare you?
-This has nothing to do with me! -Hold on. Sam wants to talk to you.
She's yelling at me. Deal with her.
Morgan sweetheart, don't be angry with us,
because we didn't mean to fall in Iove.
-We just-- it just happened. -Sam, this--
this is bull!
Sam didn't ship me off to Fort Lame because he cared about me.
He did it so he could marry my spoiled brat of a mother
without me knowing.
Is it possible that Sam had actually fallen in Iove with her?
Truth is, I had been expelled from their lives.
And now I was totally,
utterly alone.
Morgan, why'd you skip the sleepover?
Morgan.
Morgan, honey. Morgan.
Trudy, hey.
You scared the hell out of me.
Yeah, well, sorry about that.
You wanna tell me what the hell this is about?
we're the diversion.
Just keep her busy, go off and get married,
and I'm supposed to be the actress, you know?
But you're really good.
What? What are you telling me? Your mom got married?
To Sam. They told me last night.
-I didn't know anything about it. -Right.
-I have no reason to lie to you. -Well, that'd be a first.
Well, congratulations.
You finally did it.
You were just looking for an excuse to drink and you found it.
You have no idea what I've just been through.
Really? Really? Well, I'll tell you what I do know.
You have been wandering around here
like this is some great big joke waiting for Hollywood Sam to come rescue you,
but that's not gonna happen now, is it?
Okay, decision time, Claudia, Morgan, whoever the hell you wanna be!
Which is it? Which character?
What do you, for real, actually care about?
What do I care about?
Okay, no, that has to stop.
Seriously, stop.
Better.
Or not.
Please make me evaporate.
Hey.
Cut out on my sister's party. She's pretty twisted about it.
You look like crap.
Aren't you a big ray of sunshine?
-What's wrong with you? -Pick a category.
Oh.
Got it.
EIi, EIi, wait.
Please.
There's a lot that you don't know about me.
I toId everyone that I moved here to make a fresh start,
but that's really only part of the story.
Okay.
Listen, if I teII you something, you have to promise not to teII anyone,
not even Emily.
Okay, try me.
I'm here because I--
because I'm in hiding.
-Hiding? -Sort of.
From what?
My father's crazy.
He's really crazy, and he gets very violent.
He used to hit me and my mom.
What?
I just couldn't chance it.
So instead, I borrowed the pIot from my Lifetime movie
''My Father, My Stranger.''
One time he broke my nose.
-What? -My mom left him,
and the judge gave her full custody,
but then he faked his own death and he started following me around
in a disguise. He's changed his name and everything.
My mom caught on to this, of course, but then,
she got a rare blood disease, and she wasn't able to care for us anymore.
She wasn't even able to keep herself safe, let alone me,
so she thought the safest place for me to be was right here with my aunt.
I thought stuff like that only happened on TV.
Anyway,
that's why I'm so upset,
'cause I'm really afraid that he might find me,
and he can't know where I am.
He can never find me...
And then I started to cry--
partly because the role required it, but I aIso felt really terribIe
about lying to Eli.
Could you just forget I ever said anything?
No. No, I will not forget, okay?
You see him, you call me.
All right?
In the meantime, let's get your head into something else.
How about some geometry?
Yeah.
This is more boring than baking.
Try it.
Is that right?
Yeah, that's all it is right there.
-Really? -Yeah.
Okay, well, let's try another one.
-All right, here, try this. -All right.
You wanna go out this weekend?
What, like on a date?
Undefined.
Yes.
All right.
I'm not totally sure of this,
because most of my relationships have either been scripted
or happened whiIe I was drunk,
but I maybe might have a thing
for Eli Wills.
Are you dating my brother?
I don't know.
Okay, so let's try this one.
Do you have a boyfriend in New York?
Not anymore. We broke up.
I think he Iikes guys.
So the other night was a lie?
Or are you lying to me now?
I'm lying to everyone
all the time, and it sucks.
So do you like my brother?
I guess so.
Yes, I do.
Well, then don't lie to him
or to me ever again.
I don't know how much longer I can keep lying to people,
especially Eli.
And I am not smart enough to keep track of who I said what to.
I mean, maybe I should make a chart
just so I can keep things straight.
Are you going on a date or something?
What?
-No. -Yea--
Look at you. You're all dressed up and your hair.
You're going on a date! It's him right now, isn't it?
I'm gonna go get it.
Oh my God! Marissa!
Oh my God! I can't beIieve you're here!
I can't beIieve this is where they stuck you.
I've never seen your real hair before. It's different.
-You knew about this. -Sam and Bianca trying to play nice.
They did pass it through your rehab counselor.
-Hi, Marissa. I'll take your bag. -Thank you.
Oh. Oh. Oh my God.
Okay, look at this place.
Seriously, it's Iike Hello Kitty threw up in here.
Be nice. Be nice. Trudy's been really good to me.
So?
How are you, girlfriend?
-In need of a best friend. -Well, I have arrived.
And the costume people from my new movie totally hooked me up,
so we can go out and no one will know it's me.
And I wanna try out my new accent.
-Accent? -Mm-hmm.
Sugar, I feeI like we got transported
to the set of ''Ozzie and Harriet.''
Her accent was driving me crazy.
Marissa sounded like ''Fargo'' meets Jessica Simpson.
You get used to it. I like to hear the birds.
Ooh, let's get some ice cream.
Hello, can I have some vanilla in a cup, please?
And what do you want?
Do you have any nonfat sugar-free tofu?
Yeah, honey, this is an ice cream truck, all right?
Thanks.
What?
It's just-- wow.
I mean, why didn't you just order a big side of fat?
I like ice cream.
So do I, but-- okay, I'm sorry.
But do you ever plan on working again?
Of course I do. That's why I'm here, remember?
This place is a joke, Morgan.
You'd have been better off hiring a personal trainer
and doing off-Broadway.
Marissa, you don't have the vaguest idea of what I've been through.
You didn't even visit me in rehab.
I mean, one day I was your favorite party girI
and the next day I almost died.
And you couIdn't handle that, and you just cut me loose.
Why?
Look, watching you that night
at the club,
I was almost as high as you were.
Okay, it could have been me.
I know I should have visited you in rehab.
I just felt guilty.
So guilty, but I am really really sorry.
Crap. Remember, I'm CIaudia.
Okay.
-Hi. -Hey, guys.
Eli, Emily, this is my friend from back home...
Insert fake name. Insert fake name!
Daisy Du-- chovny.
-Daisy Duchovny. -Like the guy from ''X-Files''?
No relation. Too bad.
When do you want me to pick you up on Saturday?
I'll call you.
Cool. All right, well, good meeting you.
-Nice meeting you. -Thanks, guys.
See you all later.
Oh my God. You are going on a date with Billy Joe.
His name is Eli, and-- we're just friends.
Okay okay, yeah, we have to get you out of this town.
I bought you a really gorgeous dress for tonight.
-What's tonight? -We're making magic.
Oh.
Maybe we shouldn't be here. Someone's gonna see us.
It's Chicago. Who do you think we're gonna run into?
No using your real name. No VIP treatment here.
I have never paid a cover in my life.
I've actually cut way back on my drinking.
Good.
Excuse me.
Hey, ladies. I'm Carlos. What can I get for you?
Something pretty?
A Manhattan, two cherries.
I think I read your mind. And for you?
Um...
club soda with a lime.
Are you sure you don't want something pretty like your friend?
No, thank you.
Good for you. Idea:
Fly home with me, move in with me
and we forget the whole nightmare ever happened.
Go back, resume, forget. It sounded good to Morgan.
Hey, another one.
But Claudia was less sure.
Claudia had Trudy and Emily,
and Claudia had an undefined date with Eli.
Let's go, baby!
Whoo!
Whoo! Yeah!
One shot for you, baby.
For a moment, it was really like old times.
Marissa and I were invincible. Nothing could touch us.
Hey, Carlos, one more.
Here you go, sweet thing.
Hey, remember when we used to dance on the bar at Jade?
We changed our bras in front of, like, everyone.
Is it just me or are our best times when we were smashed?
Relax, okay? Loosen up. Come on!
Watch this. Excuse me, boys.
Go, baby! Whoo!
-Marissa! -Whoo!
Standing there holding that glass,
I realized how easy it would be to take a sip.
When you're sober,
staring up at someone teetering on a bar top isn't all that funny.
Marissa just looked really really drunk.
Hey, girl, do you wanna get off the bar before you kill yourseIf?
I'm not safe in Marissa's world anymore.
And let's face it, it's her world now, not mine.
Come on, we gotta go.
What?
My world was Fort Wayne... for now.
Okay, here's the thing. Sneaking in after dawn
is a Iot scarier when you're sober.
You stayed out all night.
You said you were going to dinner, and I called,
I called and I called.
-My phone was off. -That is totally unacceptabIe, Morgan.
Unacceptable!
You cannot stay here with me if you're gonna lie, drink
and stay out all night.
I didn't drink.
I didn't.
Where were you?
Out with Marissa
and then she had to catch a flight back to LA 'cause she had to be on set.
Okay, let me be very clear about this.
You do not stay out all night. You call if your plans change,
and you have another drink, and you're out.
-Okay. -Okay.
This is your house, so your rules.
Is that a line from a movie?
Probably,
but I mean it.
Give Sam a call. He's looking for you.
Okay, I'm sorry.
The truth is we fell in love while you were in rehab.
Both of us were blaming ourselves for your problems,
and I really got to see a different side to your mom.
Is this a secret side?
A side hidden from the rest of the worId?
Look, I know, I know, and I get that you're still upset.
We handled it badly, and I'm sorry.
All right.
Let's just talk about something else.
Sure. How's schooI?
Grades are bad,
friends are good
and I even have a date this weekend, sort of.
Wow. Grades, friends and boys, that's the first time
I've heard you sound like a normal teenager.
It's a lot harder than I thought, this normal-teenager thing.
Fried cola?
Two fried colas.
Oh my God.
-Thank you. -Yeah.
I started out here avoiding salads with sugar in them
and now I'm trying fried coIa.
Okay.
Oh my God.
It's really really good.
Now the ostrich races.
Stop it.
-Claudia-- - Eli, don't.
And I kissed him.
I didn't know what else to do.
I couldn't bear to hear him call me Claudia one more time.
I was seriously falling for him,
and I wanted to hear my real name.
Trudy!
Hello?
Trudy.
Tru.
Now this was unexpected.
Trudy.
You didn't call me.
I was worried sick about you. Where were you?
No comment.
Well, you're obviously seeing someone, so spill.
-Come on, tell me all about him. -It's no big deal.
It's just our second date.
He's a dentist.
Okay, well, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt on that one.
You really like this guy.
So have you slept with him yet?
Oh, my! I'm so not having that conversation with you.
No, you haven't. You just stayed up all night talking,
didn't you?
Yeah, he gave me some really good advice...
-on medical school. -On medical school?
I figure if you can reinvent yourseIf, so can I.
I'm gonna apply.
That is so great.
Welcome back to the human race.
Thank you, thanks.
And now what about you?
Is the fair the date equivalent
of Discount DarIing?
I had a really great time.
Oh, you have a thing for Eli Wells.
I had this turning in my stomach, then I reaIized what it was--
I was happy.
Bianca, she does not want to talk to you,
and I don't blame her.
What in the world is the matter with you two?
This poor kid's gone from red carpets to rehab
all before her 17th birthday.
No no, you can't come here
until you do some adult-type growing up.
Well, too bad. No.
-I had to admit... -Good night.
...I was impressed. She was on my side,
and she wasn't even taking a percentage.
An actual first.
Just as I was finally fitting into Claudia Miller's shoes,
even if they were fugly--
I saw you at the fair, hooking up with EIi.
There's a name for that, Debbie. It's called a staIker.
You probably know all about stalkers, don't you, Morgan?
It took me a second to realize
that she just called me by my real name.
You know, I had my suspicions,
but it seemed impossible,
that whole thing with ''Girls on Top'' at the sleepover.
Then last week in film class,
you referred to Spielberg as Steven.
Are you serious right now?
What the hell are you doing here?
Researching for a big movie role?
Debbie, you're crazy. I'm not Morgan.
Answer me or in minutes
the entire school's gonna know the truth about this.
Okay, come here.
I came here to recover. It's part of my rehab.
How does Eli fit into your scheme?
Scheme? It's not a scheme. I actually really like Eli.
Oh, come on, you could have Orlando or Justin.
Leave Eli the hell alone.
So that's it? You stay quiet if I stay away from EIi?
Yeah, and get your bubble-ass back to LA
where it belongs.
She knows, Sam.
This girl Debbie Ackerson, she knows.
You were photographed at a bar holding a drink.
I know it sounds totally lame,
but I was holding the drink for Marissa.
You know what? I can't even go there, Morgan.
If you're stupid enough to start drinking again,
I'm not gonna watch you destroy yourself twice.
I swear to you, Sam, I didn't take a drink.
All right, all right. Okay, I'm on it.
I'll take care of Debbie.
What do you mean? Are you gonna have her whacked?
Give her cement shoes? Dump her in the river?
I'm gonna have to send a lawyer over there with confidentiality papers.
We're gonna have to buy her off.
You're gonna have to be very careful. Reporters have picked up the scent now.
All right, be very careful and do me a favor:
Watch for peopIe following you.
Are you serious? Okay, all right.
I had to start thinking like Morgan Carter again.
We are prepared to pay you...
$5,000.
-$5,000? -Mm-hmm.
Gee, Mr. Lawyer, that's so much money
to little old me.
Who do you think I am? I read the tabloids.
I watch ''Extra.''
Add a zero, buddy.
-$50,000? - Yeah.
Eli! I got a B minus on my geometry test!
-What? Yeah! -I know.
-Yeah! -It's a freakin' miracIe!
I was getting worried
and really starting to think I was dumb.
Yeah, you're hardly dumb.
I could not have done it without you.
Look at this thing.
What's wrong?
-I think I'm being followed. -Followed by who, your dad?
-Did he hire someone? -Morgan! Morgan!
Over here, Morgan!
Morgan, where have you been?
I couldn't go back to the school, so I went to the one place the press
wouldn't look for me-- the mall. Did you look outside?
Yeah, I think half the free press is out on my lawn.
Oh, it's gotten worse.
And Sam called. He said that he and Bianca are coming to get me.
How do they print this this fast?
Yeah, I believe that you
literally stopped the Fort Wayne presses.
Oh, I TiVoed something earlier.
Prepare yourself.
...none other than Morgan Carter.
And here's what some of her teachers and classmates had to say:
I met her on the first day,
and we totaIIy hit it off.
Yeah, in my stomach with a voIIeybaII.
I feel like we've all been punked.
Miss Carter has been a wonderful addition to our-- my school.
Well, her cinematic insights
in my class were incredible, actually.
-A terrific kid. -We're close personal friends.
Well, in fact, we've got a project in development together.
Love you, Morgan.
This is unbelievable. Everyone's an actor.
Excuse me. Excuse me, Eli. Eli.
-No no no. What are you doing? -Is it true you were dating Morgan
-and had no idea who she was? -Excuse us, okay?
Did she wear a disguise?
-Can you leave him alone? -How can you not have known?
Because she lied, okay? She was really good at it.
Now get out of my way.
-Did you see that look on his face? -Yeah.
I really hurt him.
You know what I would usually do in a situation like this
where everything just sucked and I didn't know what to do?
I'd go out and get really trashed.
But right now I just care about Eli and Emily.
God. How do I fix this?
Well, you know, the old Morgan wouIdn't have cared.
This is my home.
I felt like I was part of something.
I like being anonymous.
I like hanging out with you.
I don't even mind baking.
And I don't mind doing homework,
and I love going to the fair.
Morgan can't do any of those things.
Maybe not in the same way.
So it's all over?
All right, let 'em through.
Oh, great, here they come.
-Hello! - Morgan!
Sweetheart, how are you?
I'm terrible, Mom. How are you?
-Oh, I know we haven't talked-- -Honey, I don't think this is the time.
Actually, you know what, though? Now is great, so, Mom, let's talk.
Mom, so you and Sam fell in love
while I was in rehab, and he saw a totally different side of you.
So when do I get to see this side?
-I know you're mad about the wedding. -No, listen, you know what?
Let's shove past it.
Sam's the second-best thing that's ever happened to me.
I mean, after you, of course. Enough about me.
I wanted to believe her. I really did,
but somehow I had the feeling
that we both had more life-work to do,
and she was still wearing my Quentin Tarantino earrings.
Let's focus here,
'cause Oprah's people already called. They wanna hear your side of the story.
Plus, Lorne Michaels owes me a huge favor,
so let's get you on ''Saturday Night Live.''
-Tell her the really big news. -Big news?
-You ready for this? -I don't know.
-'Cause you got the part. -In the Soderbergh film.
-Wait. What? -Lindsay dropped out!
She's in rehab... again.
And the world just keeps spinning.
No, Trudy, this is the part that I really really wanted.
It could change everything for me as an actress.
Exactly, which is why we gotta get you out of here and back to LA.
So that's it? You're gonna whisk her away from all the work she's been doing?
Bianca, this is crazy.
She's just starting to do well.
She's an actor, Tru.
Her life's in Hollywood, not here.
She spent her entire childhood working.
Now she has a chance to be a semi-normal kid,
-even if it is just for senior year. -You don't understand the business.
If she misses out on this, we know she ruins her career forever.
-That's the worst possible scenario? -That's exactly what that is.
-What about college? -What is she gonna learn in college?
Why isn't anyone asking what I'm thinking?!
-We're listening. We're listening. - What I need?
I had the stage, the solo and the monologue,
but I didn't know my lines.
Morgan?
-I-- -What do you want, Morgan?
I don't know.
The paparazzi followed Morgan's limousine all the way
to a local airport, where Morgan, her mother and her manager
boarded a private jet back to Hollywood...
I can't believe the news is actually covering this garbage.
No one has seen or heard from Morgan...
Well, the reporters are finally gone.
And word has it Morgan's just been tapped
to star in Steven Soderbergh's new fiIm.
Think you'll ever see her again?
No, it was all an act, Em.
Okay? AII of it, even me.
-What is it? -I think it's Morgan Carter
-in our bushes. -What?
What are you doing? We just saw you get into a jet on TV.
That was a decoy me. They do it all the time.
Why don't you go back to your abusive staIker father?
Come on.
I had to taIk to Eli.
Well, I've done it in the movies enough times.
What now?
Morgan, are you all right?
Help!
You don't look too red carpet now.
Can I have five minutes?
And the lies just bloomed until I was completely trapped by them.
I mean, I didn't know who I was, and I didn't know who to trust.
Debbie found out
and she blackmailed me.
She did?
I know now I should have trusted you guys.
I'm really sorry.
I really am.
So what are you doing here?
I decided to stay in Fort Wayne...
and finish high schooI.
Be serious.
Everyone will get used to it. When it's no longer a story,
no one will care.
What about your Soderbergh movie?
I passed on it.
There will be other roles,
but there won't be other senior years.
So I want to spend mine here
with Trudy and with you guys.
Whatever.
Eli...
I know you feel totally betrayed,
and I get that,
but what I feeI for you
is real.
You-- you actually care about me.
It wasn't about if I could boost your press coverage
or how good I look on your arm, you know, it was--
You helped me and--
and it was just 'cause you wanted to.
And that's why I fell for you.
You know, I can't tell--
I just can't teII when you're lying
or acting...
or whatever you call it. It's--
I'm tired.
I should probably turn in.
Just give him time.
-You think? -Yeah.
Maybe. Maybe not.
I'm gonna go, okay?
Okay.
Hi, I'm Mary Kitchen, live here at Hillhaven High School
where Morgan Carter has been a student
at our very own local high schooI.
This is insane. Are you gonna be okay?
Yeah, I have something for you, though.
-For me? -Yes.
Good luck in school.
-Thank you. -Oh, are you anti-hug now?
Get over here.
All right, here we go again.
It was one thing to go to high school as Claudia Miller.
Now I had to play the same part as myself.
But I had to admit, I was pretty terrified.
Morgan!
Is it true that you're going back to high schoo?
Morgan, over here, Morgan!
Thank you!
Morgan, over here, Morgan!
Hi.
Hey.
Come on, let's get out of here. Come on.
There's no script for what comes next.
I'll just have to figure it out.